Monday, May 24, 2010

It's been months...literatly!

It has been one year and 12 days since my life changing surgery. I have gone from 279 to 129!!! I wore a size 26 and now a size 8 in jeans, The change is amazing.

I never realized how superficial people were. I never realized how people looked at me or how they treated me different. However...I am on the other side of things now. What I mean is this, if there was ever a skinny girl who spoke or looked near my husband I would boil...I'm now that skinny girl. I can't believe how many women are Soooooooo insane. I mean hello it's my job to ask how you are doing and tell you to have a great day, calm down it's not code for "i want your man".

I also find myself relating to overweight people who don't know me and don't know I've lost 150lbs and they will look at me like i am bonkers. There was a customer at work and we were talking about thighs rubbing together and not being able to find clothes, I think she seriously thought I was mental. Being big is still a part of my brain and it's almost a concious effort to remember that i'm not that person anymore.

A friend asked if I would do it again. Yes. It was rough at first, but honestly what isn't when a change is underway? I can't say I love my body more than I did but the confidence I have gained and the fact that I am so much healthier is what I do love. I actually wear clothes that fit! I don't wear large t-shirts (no really, they are way too big, LOL) to hide my body. Granted I have a roll, but it's much smaller than it used to be :) I have a lot of extra skin but it's okay, someday that will be gone too.

For now that is all. I must head to work.

Thursday, August 13, 2009

3 months 1 day.

It has been a long time, eh? Due to cruddy computers and family visiting and life overall i haven't been doing so great at tracking my progress. Let me see if I can do a rather speedy update.

On May 12,2009 I had RNY also known as Gastric Bypass. I spent 5 days in the hospital and went home in great spirits. I still will not eat jello, broth, or carnation instant breakfast! :)

Physically I was feeling fine until I started having some pain in my kidneys. Ended up in the ER was told it was a UTI. A week later I found that I actually had a kidney stone that was trying to pass. That was not a fun day. Blood work, IV, CAT scan, Straight Cath and a shot of potassiam later I was allowed to go home. I was told to strain my urine and take the stone to my DR. That evening I passed it. Little did I know I would soon pass 5 more.

Over the course of all of the pain, tingling in my hands, feet, and face I learned through my last ER visit, that Low potoassiam was the cause. The other doctors had mentioned it but said nothing more, i was even given liquid script and I didn't take it because it was so nasty. Turns out a defency of this sort can be fatal, they like your levels to be above 3.6 mine was 2.6. It took me hearing that I could die if my pottasiam was to get any lower before i finally started taking it. I found some no sugar added OJ and mixed it in there and found it tolerable.
Since then my levels have evened out and I have been problem free.

In total i have lost 75lbs and i am 2.5lbs from hitting 199lbs.

Honestly i haven't started extercising. I mean, I def have more energy and my house is a lot cleaner. I do laundry now because I don't get so winded climbing the stairs. I can actually go to Lane Bryant and not pray that the biggest size will fit. I've lost 3 cup sizes off my boobs and 4 inches off my girth. I'm wearing a 20-22 in pants vs. a 26.

I have vowed that this Saturday evening I will start at the gym. I wanted to get to 200 first and and then start building muscle. I'm excited, and while i'm getting a bit flabby and my "bat wings" are becoming a bit....flighty ;) I'm still okay with it though. Even with all my flab I will still look better than I did when I was heavier. I've gotta run but I'll be back to update, hopefully with pictures :) And it won't be in 3 more months either.

Monday, May 11, 2009

Tomarrow is the Day

This has been in the making Since January. 5 months!! I had my first consult the 9th of feb and from there I've lost 8lbs. Doesn't sound like a lot but to me, it's the most I've ever lost. Seriously. I have never lost weight on my own. It took serious label reading and serious extercising.

The hardest part has been the liquid diet. By about 2pm, i'm ready to eat my arm. It has brought on headaches and lots of dizzy spells, but it slowly has begun to be easier...even if i did cheat a little. According to my scale i lost 5 more lbs this last week! Yah!!

So tomarrow is the day. I also will be having my tubes tied and I am happy about that. I don't see us having anymore kiddos. I love the three i've had and thats all i need.

Few people know about the surgery still. I told my Dad and he was supportive, he knows I've always struggled with my weight, I was relieved about that. I think after the surgery I will feel better about people knowing. Right now i'm already nervous and the last thing I want is people putting doubts in my head.

Today is a busy day, I have to get the house in order while i'm gone. Kate is a Godsend, she is stayign the night tonight and watching after the kids tomarrow. Thank God for her! Well I am done here for now. I need to get on the ball to ensure everything will go smoothly while i'm away! New Stomach here I come!!!

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Lets have a moment..

I haven't been behaving.... I have been eating fast food and drinking soda...more than I care to admit. The scale has stayed the same luckly. Tomarrow is a new day, I will once again get back on the wagon and stay on it.

This time of year is hard on me. I never considered myself a "emotional eater" But I am definitly beginning to see that I am. You see....three years ago our little family suffered a saddening loss. We had a little girl who was born with many health problems because she was born with a chromosomal abnormality, called Patau Syndrome or Trisomy 13. She was blind and deaf and was never able to eat from a bottle or nurse. She came home at 5 wks and we never slept. She had to be fed every two hours and there was medicine that had to be given as often. It was a very hard time but we loved her and cherished her every day we had her.
On April 23 she passed away at 10 wks 5 dys. Every year my heart aches and it tears me apart. I can't help but go over the days leading up to her passing, I remember everything. We knew she would go, we had learned that early on but even when you doesn't make it any more easy. I have a friend whose daughter is close in age to her. It breaks my heart seeing where she should have been in her life, the things she should be doing now. I know that things happen for a reason. I know God has plans, I truely believe that. It just isn't always comforting.

I know this has made me a stronger person, in a lot of ways. I'm just not that person right now. I miss her terribly and this time of year amplifies it...

I know my Lainie would want me to be happy and Not cry for her. Thats why I WILL go back to the gym tomarrow. I will work my butt off and I will focus on what I need to do. Thats the least I can do...

For more information on the chomosomal abnormality that Alaina and other children have lost their battles to and more kids who are fighting everyday check out this website. Patau Syndrome is rare and many people do not even know that they are at risk for having a baby with it, I never had a clue.... Help raise awareness!!

~Alaina Hope Molchak~
Feb 8, 2006 - April 23, 2006

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Almost there!!

Well again, it's been awhile. My computer was in the shop for a good month and something. A couple weeks ago I finally got my date! the surgery is set for May 12! I can't even believe it. Honestly I'm not sure it's hit me. I'm still losing weight....granted, I have fallen off the wagon a couple times but got back on and kept going.

It's definitly not easy to completely turn your lifestyle upside down and inside out. I did awesome for the first three weeks and then... yep...I had a whoops... well I've had a few. Considering overall since this process began, I am doing splended. I have a soda once a week along with one meal that is my reward for being good the rest of the week. This happens on the weekends. Usually a Saturday. I began going to the gym daily. I was thrilled on Tuesday when I walked a mile in 19 mins!! I was even more thrilled when I saw that the scale had still moved over the weekend!

I am down to 268.2 Just a little over a lb before I hit my first 10lb goal. I'm stoked that I have been able to lose on my own. However, I know though that it would be a constant forever battle if I were to continue on my own. I have been actively trying to lose since the first of Feb. 10lbs in 2 months, I suppose isn't bad. I'm going to kick it up a notch and add in my weights, just for toning. I would really like to drop 10 more pounds before my surgery. This would thrill me and the doctors!!

I'm getting prepared. I have my chewable vitamins, I'm going to pick up my chewable calicum and vitamin D on Pay day. I already take all three, but for the first 6 wks all of those have to be chewable. I will also stock up on my unflavored protien powder. I really perfer that to the flavored ones. I found a nice "Natural Soy" with 13 grams at GNC. It's awesome in soup.

Thats all I got.... For Now. I'm going to have Aaron take pics of me and get them up here. A few women have mentioned that they regret not taking more photos before the surgery. while I can't imagine ever wanting to look back on my old self, I can see how it would be nice to see the difference. I'm also going to pack away, a shirt and a pair of jeans, a bra and some panties. I want to be able to compare. Should be interesting!! Till next time!

Saturday, February 21, 2009

What can happen in a month?

It's been a month since I posted, A lot has happened. I got approved by Tricare and had my Consult on the 9th of Feb and it went well. I was given a lot of info and for the first couple days I was very overwhelmed. I had to start eating 60 grams of Protien and not exceed 40 grams of fat. I've never really counted anything but carbs and have never known how much fat I should have a day. On top of that I had to start looking at protien shakes and watch my sugar intake.

On the 10th I met with the nutrionist. I had kept a food diary since the 11th of Jan so she had a good idea of my eating habits. The only complaints she had was the occasional Dr. Pepper and the Orange Juice. She offered more protien shake ideas and websites of where to get some good ones.

On the 18th I had my Pysch Evaul and that went well too. I actually found out interesting new things like inbetween 6 to 9 months out womens sex drive normally pick up and since they are more fertile due to the weight loss thats usually when women will accidentally get pregnant. Which is not something we want.

Right now i'm just sorta waiting. I have 3 weeks left of taking Vitiman D pills and then i'm waiting on them to schedule a date. While i've been waiting I've started my diet. Low Fat, Low Sugar and Low Carb. I cut out the Dr. Pepper, Mayo, and the worst one, Mcdonalds. Until here recently I did not know how bad I was sabatoging myself by eating it. It's quite insane really! For what I would normally eat was right around 1700 calories. From what I understand women should only have 1800 a day. Granted Usually I wouldn't eat all of it but what does that save me, 500 calories? Still insane.

So How much weight have I dropped? The scale at the consults office said 277.6 When I weighed my self while playing Wii Fit with Ammie on Thursday the 19th, I weighed 272.1 I weighed myself this morning and I weighed 268.0! I'm leary of scales, they like to lie so If I've really lost all of that, I'm estatic!

So thats all for now, this has turned out really long but it has been a month. I'll try to post more often!

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Step two and three down

Well I got my paperwork completed and my records. Today Ammie and I ran everything over to UNMC and we should hear about our consults soon. I'm so excited I can't stand it. More anxious I suppose than anything.

This year has brought on a new slate, with that i've been talking to old friends some of whom I haven't seen in 5 years. It's crazy how time flies and people change.

Another thing.

There are only a few people that know about this surgery that I am pursueing. Ammie, Amy, Aaron, Kate, Lisa and Denise. Amy has had the RNY and is my origional inspiration. Lisa and Denise both have the lapband and Ammie is doing the surgery with me. Aaron is ofcourse gonna know everything and Kate, well Kate is the least judgemental person i've ever met.

As for everyone else...I don't want to be judged. I am doing what I feel is best for me and my family. Unless you have walked in my shoes, you can't know what being this heavy is like. What it does to you, the effect it has on you Not just physically but mentally too.

People look at you different, it doesn't matter how nice you are or how pretty you may be. All they see is the weight. That makes it really hard to have self confidence and that affects every aspect of your life. I'm really excited this is seriously the best tool ever!